It's Probably Overrated, Anyway

(December 24, 2008)

To grow up stable and well-adjusted, you must take your pretend best friend to the well of your heart and drown him; as he screams, he will become as invisible to you as he is to everyone else. You must pierce the heart of every one of the toys who has ever spoken to you, bearing down until nothing but stuffing pours out. You must administer silver to the werewolves whose howls called to your imagination, garlic to the vampires who taught your loins about adolescent lust, and iron to the faeries who danced under the moonlight to the rhythm of your heartbeat. You must forget every dream as soon as you wake up, instructing Morpheus to scratch your name from his book, and wrap your thoughts in the white picket fence which is your only allowable metaphor. You must wipe that smile from your face and tell Coyote, without a trace of irony, that you just don't get the joke.

That is, if you want to grow up stable and well-adjusted...